If Becky were writing this she’d probably want to tell you that “he’s a boy, because he’s got fat palps!” which is so quotable I’m pretty sure she’s going to make it into a kids book at some point. If peer pressure has it’s way of course.

Hey you know what’s freakier than googling “Spiders”? Try “spider with babies” that’s like a billion times worse! x1 worse for every baby. So pretty much exactly a billion.

↓ Transcript
Spider trying to claim 'web and contents insurance’ "I'm sorry ma’am but your policy doesn’t cover acts of God."

"It wasn't God! I know the bastard who did it; I lived in the corner of his room!."

“A ‘giant hand’, as you’ve described it, came down to destroy your dwelling. That’s Act of God 101.”