They came, they saw, they got the fuck out. While Bill may not have been the ideal inter-species diplomat, at least he presented the alien visitors with a fairly accurate representation of humanity on an off day. I sometimes think that if we ever do get to meet another race of creatures, we’ll be stuck in that ‘first date’ sort of nicey-nice fakeness for a good while before each side figures out that they’re just as dickish as each other. Maybe it’d be better to just let out those metaphorical farts right at the start and move on from there.

↓ Transcript
An irascible old man sits on his porch, can of beer in hand, shotgun across his lap.
Caption: Bill had never been comfortable with human contact.

Zoom out to reveal that his house is under a transparent dome, on a small asteroid.
Caption: He went to some lengths to avoid it.

Zoom out again to reveal a part of a mothership too big to fit in the frame, launching an alien landing vessel down to the asteroid.
Caption: Bill was not the best candidate for first contact.