Starfield has boldly gone where no fallout has gone before. Quality assurance.
You yourself may have boldly gone and gotten the best deal on the market right now and gotten a month of game pass, and you’re not alone. They’re behind you.
In a video I never made last year I would have made the bold claim that game pass and it’s cloud gaming in particular were the best gaming platform of 2022. I didn’t make that video because if i did I’d come across as some sort of corpo dick rider just doing it for the money.
Game pass is the best gaming platform of 2023. On day one I played the opening sequence of starfield on the bus on my phone. It was like witnessing a majestic vibrating postage stamp.
But I’m not here to talk about Starfield specifically. I’ll leave that up to literally every other YouTuber on the planet to talk about Fallout: New Space Edition. Let’s talk about gamepass.
The first thing you should know about gamepass is that Microsoft has sucked at marketing since Bill Gates put on a trenchcoat to talk about Doom and somehow looked even more like a gigantic nerd.
So when a new game comes out that you’re excited for double check you haven’t already got it on pass first. Because you might accidentally end up supporting it otherwise.
They suck so bad at letting you know what’s coming to the pass, the coming soon tab only gives you the barest taste of what’s coming up.
Some Games I’m excited for coming to pass include Jusant, a beautiful looking climbing game by Don’t Nod and Cities Skylines II, the balm that will help me forget how badly I got burned by Simcity.
But while we wait for those here’s a quick grab bag of other titles to check out. I’m going to stay super brief so we can get through them all, but if you’d like a chunkier review on any of these giz a shoutout in the comments. And if there’s some gems I really missed (and I know for a fact I left some off this list) please let everyone else know in the comments.
There’s just something about biking straight into a pine tree at a 100km an hour that really appeals to me. This is a roguelite racer with randomised maps and a difficulty curve entirely up to you. It’s only ever your fault that you land on your neck three times in a row.
Plague tail requiem
Twenty hours of anxiety inducing child whispering. I’d recommend playing the first one first though. But you can get a feel of what to expect just playing the intro of this one.
Roleplay as a guy who never leaves two city blocks and just wants to play games all day. Wait a second-
But seriously this game is one of the funniest games I’ve played in my life. Decent brawling, hilarious side quests.
Persona Royale 5
By day your a school kid dealing with relationships and by night you’re inside the heads of a bunch of perverts catching demons. Trigger warning, perverts.
Soul Hackers 2
Persona if it was made only when the boss was looking at your screen so youd look busy.
Finally I understand why Americans like delivering freedom via bullets and death. It’s just lots of fun and for a good cause. Playing this in co-op usually ends with one of you dead due to everyone being too god damn trigger happy around the propane. If you played Broforce way back in the day do yourself a solid- poo and then go check it out again.
Where the fuck do I go now, bug edition.
Golf with your friends
Watch your friends turn into individual atoms of rage as a log falls out of nowhere and screws their shot. Glitchy and rough. 10/10
A Saturday Morning cartoon turned into a rhythm action game. Featuring a protagonist hammier than the meals served to Muslim prisoners at Guantanamo bay.
It Takes Two
The ultimate co-op game about two parents trying to make a little kid cry. Rookies. I don’t need anyone’s help to do that. By the way you don’t need to convince a friend to also get gamepass to play this with em online. They can play free.
Survival exploration for people who like bugs. Also there’s an arachnophobia option that turns all the spiders into orbs of doom.
Anyway thanks for reading, I hope that you, like me, are excited to never truly own a game ever again.